The Winter X Games are pretty badass. I could quit writing with that sentence and the post would be official, but I won't stop there. Allow your mind to be blown, please.

Fuck the Olympics, with all the rules and lame ass activities, it's boring. It takes way too long to finish. The X Games take place over one weekend and that is all I need till next winter. If the Olympics would cut out two weeks of the competition, it may get more viewers than re-runs of Saved By the Bell. But as the flawed system stands, it won't. Honestly though curling is pretty fun to watch at three in the morning on a random cable news network. Those chicks are hot.

Back to the Winter X Games, these dudes are putting their asses on the line. Watching a snowboarder take a header into a snow fence after failing on a big air almost gave me a boner. No lie. It's pretty sick what these cats can do on a ten inch wide piece of wood, just ask Pam Anderson, that takes talent. The best thing about watching the snowboarding big air contest, no commercials. Monster, the shitty energy drink, sponsored the whole thing to go commercial free for at least a half hour. Sorry Monster, you are no Mt. Dew, the sweet nectar of the gods. The snowboarding was on right after some weird snowcross race where they factor in style points on the jumps. My 3 year old loved it, and it kept him distracted from The Wonder Pets or any number of shitty Nickelodeon shows. He loved seeing a guy drop a sled inches from his head after a jump went wrong. I'll admit that I replayed it a few times for him to laugh at too.

I have two beefs with the Winter X Games though, enough with the scrolling message on the bottom of the screen explaining that Shawn White failed to make the cut on an event. Seeing for the fortieth time didn't effect me any more than the first time it scrolled across. I know everybody watches for him, just like people watch golf for Tiger Woods. Which brings up a good question, who gets more poon, Tiger or the Flying Tomato? The other beef, no hockey. Hold up, you may be thinking. He doesn't even like hockey. You are right, I don't care for it much, about as much as the clap or David Hasslehoff. Only good for an occasional joke. But couldn't ESPN come up with some extreme hockey concept game, instead of the lame duck All Star Game that is going to be watched by tens of people this weekend. C'mon Gary Bettman, make this happen. Skip the Olympics the next time around and get on the X Games bandwagon, I have.

Ronald